Be Silent and Listen...Sometimes

As an awkward freshman in high school, I often felt overwhelmed by loneliness, despite having a great community around me. I yearned for deeper connections. One day, while riding to Best Buy, my dad shared a piece of wisdom his father had given him:"You know, if you want to make more friends, be silent and listen. Really listen. People love to be listened to. It's the key to building lasting relationships. Ask them questions and actually listen to what they tell you."

Lessons in Listening

Years later, as a young teacher, I had a conversation with a mentor who had transitioned into education after a successful 20-year career in the private sector. While discussing our roles on a school district committee, she shared this insight:"This isn't life; it's business. In business, if you show up to a lot of meetings and have nothing of value to add, they eventually stop inviting you. If I'm on a steering committee, I assume I was appointed because they want my opinion."

Her point was clear: showing up isn’t enough. I had been present and I had been listening, but in the professional context, that was sufficient. I needed to contribute meaningfully.

Striking a Balance

Now, as someone who sits in meetings almost daily, I see the wisdom in both perspectives. To thrive in a world of bureaucracy, politics, funding partnerships, and leadership, there’s a delicate balance between listening and contributing.

Proverbs 18:13 offers timeless advice: "If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame." This isn’t a call to remain silent indefinitely, but a reminder to listen deeply and think critically before speaking.

In the digital age, we’re inundated with more data and information than any one person could ever possibly process. The ability to filter through the noise and identify valuable insights is a skill that sets true leaders apart. Adding value isn’t about saying more; it’s about listening and then, eventually, saying what matters.

Conclusion

Whether you’re building relationships or contributing to large-scale projects, the art of listening is indispensable. It’s not just about being silent—it’s about truly hearing others and responding thoughtfully.

So, the next time you’re in a meeting or a conversation, remember: listen first, filter the noise, and share only what adds genuine value. It's the foundational step to building trust, relationships, and a reputation that lasts.